Thursday, October 1, 2015


One afternoon, the regulars gathered for their ritualistic get-together for the Mincha- Maariv daily service, when it was noticed that the rabbi looked particularly distressed and agitated. Word was passed that he had ben served with a subpoena to be a witness in an ongoing criminal federal trial and he found this to be most unsettling.

"Let's give him a double shot of brandy and send him to court in a cab."

This apparently had the desired effect for the rabbi seemed to have composed himself as he occupied a front row seat.

At last, his name was called as the next witness and he confidently took the stand.

When the judge took his measure, he especially noted his long gray beard, orthodox dress and long sideburns and said to his clerk, "I think we'll need an interpreter for this witness."

The interpreter was sworn after which the rabbi indignantly looked up at the judge and intoned:"Your Honor, I want you to know that I graduated from Harvard College with honors and it was at that time that I commenced my rabbinical studies and I believe that it's quite obvious, from the very manner in which I am addressing the court, that there exists absolutely no necessity for an interpreter." He was sneering now.

At this point, the interpreter turned to the judge and bellowed, "EHR HAT GEZOGT….."